Raising a generation that stands against Domestic Violence

This month highlights the fight against Domestic Violence, and as a survivor, it got me thinking of ways to reduce the horrendous statistics.  It brought me back to the beginning of a person. What if parenting was used as a tool against Domestic Violence? If we raised aware boys and girls to become men and women who are wired to respect themselves and each other equally.

What if we raised girls;

  • With a strong sense of self
  • With healthy self esteem
  • To understand what a healthy relationship looks like
  • To determine what their emotional needs are and how to have those needs met in healthy relationships
  • To not just be pleasers
  • To understand the value of their bodies and the person who is inside of them
  • To not use their body as sexual currency
  • To have healthy self-love and self confidence
  • To understand that they are not required to be in a relationship by a set age or married by a set age
  • To know that they are not of lesser value than men nor are they of a higher value
  • To know they were not created solely for the pleasure of men
  • To know that it is ok to say no
  • To know that they do not have to apologize for having dreams, desires and setting values
  • Who understand that their value is not solely dependent on having a man, on domestic capabilities or on their sexual performance
  • To respect boundaries
  • Who truly believe that they are beautiful enough, good enough, smart enough, talented enough… that they are enough

What if we raised boys;

  • With a strong sense of self
  • With healthy self-esteem
  • To understand their emotions and how to express them healthily
  • To understand what a healthy relationship looks like
  • To understand what value they bring to a relationship outside of sex and or their wallets
  • To understand that true power isn’t in the ability to raise a fist and pummel another
  • To know how to cope with rejection
  • To determine what their emotional needs are and how to have those needs met in a healthy relationship
  • To have a healthy sense of self-love and self-confidence
  • To understand their value and the person they are on the inside
  • To know that their sole value is not in the organs that hang beneath their legs
  • To understand that their worth is not determined by domination of women
  • To understand how respect is gained
  • To understand women are not of a lesser value nor a higher value than they are
  • To understand that they do not have less moral obligations to uphold than women
  • To take responsibility for their actions, feelings and thoughts good or bad
  • To understand that asking for help is not weakness but wisdom
  • To respect boundaries
  • Who truly believe that they are handsome enough, good enough, smart enough, talented enough… that they are enough

What if we used the greatest influence, that of parenting, at the most crucial times, during the formative years, to raise a generation that stands against domestic violence?

We need to stop hiding occurrences of domestic violence. Being abused is never ok.

 

1 Comment

  1. Terri on October 2, 2018 at 5:19 pm

    I so endorse this….when we teach our children to love God and to love themselves …self awareness, self esteem, self worth … our relationships and the world will be impacted….I dare say revolutionised. As parents we must first be willing to go through the process of transforming ourselves…do the hard work. Then and only then could our children see and appreciate value in the message you shared above.

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